Doom Does America

by Sarlacc

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february 2009. sarlacc enters a friend's studio to track a long overdue full-length album entitled Carkoon Doom. the plan is to document 21 recordings. two days of labor yields 11 raw, unmixed tracks that wind up constituting the entirety of the album before your eyes and ears. unexpected and mundane misfortunes gave way to a crashed recording rig and no time to complete the album before touring begins in may. a total of 55 copies of this album were made and packaged in dvd snap cases.

album cover designed by Jimmy Giegerich (


released June 1, 2009



all rights reserved


Sarlacc Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

"Two there should be; no more, no less. One to embody power, the other to crave it."

Heavy music of varying velocities, stained by Star Wars, hailing from Pittsburgh and performed by two.

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Track Name: Applied Human Carbon Freezing
It's science
Do you get it?
No, you're no physicist
Carbonite freezing
Earth ions won't allow it here
I know, sucks for us
Solo, he's alive in perfect hibernation
I love you/I know
Carbonide, one more electron
He's all yours, bounty hunter
Catbonate, that's it
Track Name: Han Solo's Black Vest
This vest is for asthetic and pimping purposes only
Space chicks dig it and I look fucking good
Track Name: Galactic Empire Administration
Senator union
war emergency, all power
Corruption disguise
Yes We Can is a lie
Galactic ruler
Barack Palpatine, emperor
You've failed, your highness
Track Name: Entombment of a Wookie
I have come for the bounty on thie wookie
Ya tae ya tae yo teo
I want 50,000, no less
I have come with a thermal detonator
Am I your kind of scum?
But you don't know why I'm here
Track Name: Force Choke
This Force is greater than the non-existence of your gods
You place false hopes that you are correct in your beliefs
This is something real
Feel it flow through me
Feel my grip tightening around your neck
This is your end, I choose you to die
Suffocation, suffering because of your insolence
I find your lack of faith disturbing
Track Name: Indiana Jones & the Jedi Temple of Doom
I'm the one who made the Kessel Run in less than 12 fucking parsecs, you piece of filth
The Jedi Council cannot defeat Mola Ram
He'll rip their hearts out and eat them
Point five past lightspeed
Captain Han Solo, he's too pimp to be a Jedi batard
Master of the bullwhip, blaster at his side
He's in love with Luke's sister, fucking Sabbac shark
Imperial Navy dropout, bloodstripes down his sides
Track Name: Technological Terror
Fire at will
All systems go
This station is fully operational
More systems will suffer the same fate as Alderaan
This station is now the ultimate power in the universe
I suggest that we fucking use it
Don't be too proud of this technological terror
Track Name: Setting Fire to Sleeping Wompas
Finding yourself in an icy cave
Upsidedown, need your lightsaber
Fuck that monster up, eat his fucking guts!
Cut down, arm amputation
Wompa Stompa, now you're dead
Degobah System destination
Hoth is really fucking cold
Taun tauns wreak on the inside
Track Name: CGI Jedi
1977 was the greatest year ever for one reason
1997 was the worst year ever for one fucking reason
It's Star Wars, not Toy Story
It's sci-fi, not kids movies
Special Edition sucks
Episode I sucks
Episode II sucks
Episode III sucks
It's Star Wars, not Toy Story
Hollywood punks sell out
Holy Trilogy sanctity sold out
Science fiction action violence replaced by this CGI shit
Made-on-a-Mac cartoon movies taking over celluloid film
Track Name: Give Me My Hand Back
The emperor's voice
Fills the room as Vader
Kneels before his master
Shit, why'd you slice off my hand?
It's imparative that you understand
Hand amputations run in this Jedi family
I am your father
Track Name: Carkoon Doom
Life as you know it is about to be fucked
Deep inside the pit before you
awaits a dark and bizarre end
1,000 years of unrelenting agony
1,000 years of conscious death
No gods can save you now from these teeth and tentacles (No beak)
Telepathic assimilation bonds you to what has consumed you
The nesting place of Sarlacc
Is your resting place for eternity
After a millenium of defense
A heinous expiration anticipates those who stand in our way